Why Your Story Matters

I have had this conversation a lot lately. Actually, ever since I started the She’s Got a Story series, I have found myself talking to women about why their stories matter.

There is a measure of imposter syndrome—the belief that your success isn’t merited or that you don’t belong with the caliber of people you are surrounded by. But there also seems to be this deep-seated misconception that our personal stories aren’t important. Unless you have thousands of followers, you can trump other people’s trauma, or if you are doing something “worthy” with your life, struggles, triumphs, and heart, you don’t measure up. That’s a lie. A lie we tell ourselves to stay small, to stay protected, to excuse our fear of vulnerability.

And, sweet friend, it’s time to stop believing the lie.

I was in women’s ministry for more than 15 years. I cheered for women as they achieved their goals, opened businesses, lost weight, nurtured their families, traveled the world, beat illness, overcame their fears, loved fiercely, offered grace, and made a difference in their community. I learned early that every woman has a story. And every woman’s story is important and heart-changing… world-changing.

I have been inspired by heroines in stories Hollywood wishes they could write. I have cried over happy endings that make me believe in miracles. I have hugged women as they wrestle with inner demons, slay dragons (or circumstances that feel like fire-breathing monsters), and fight for others. I have seen women change their communities with a simple act of love, through their organizational skills, and by showing up when others wouldn’t. Those stories, those women are in the community (yours and mine).

What if today you could read about a woman who saw a need for loving homes and, through foster parenting, expanded her family and found her calling? What if, instead of one more election commercial, you watched a video about a woman who never fit in as a child but built a safe space for others in her bookstore? What if the story that tells someone they belong or that they can keep going is yours?

Our stories matter. Our words matter. We matter.

By sharing who we are and where we’ve come from, we give others hope, plant seeds of hope, tell God’s story of redemption and healing and make space for others to be themselves…to share themselves.

Since July, I have been sharing women’s stories online. One unplanned outcome has been the outpouring of love the women receive from their loved ones and community. The few words I publish help the women to see how others see them. That outpouring counters the lie that our lives and stories don’t matter.

For many years, I had a blog, wrote & taught Bible studies, and always seemed to have a story or poem in the works. As our children were entering high school and the world wrestled with the beginning of the pandemic, a Pastor stood in front of the congregation and, during his sermon, said, “The world does not need your words or opinions.”  Somehow, I took those words to heart, and although I pursued a degree in Creative Writing, I stopped sharing my gifts and passions. I stopped writing.

While now I can see the irony of thinking I shouldn’t write publicly based on one man’s opinions (maybe the world only needed his?), it has taken me years to see that I have a gift that I am squandering because I let some guys words eclipse the positive feedback, life change and beauty I saw blossom from my writing.

If my gifts matter, so do yours. If my story matters, so does yours. If I matter,  so do you.

I am not saying you must air your dirty laundry, share your deepest and darkest secrets, or start a trauma dump YouTube channel. What I am saying is there is an audience for your story – it might be the neighbor going through a divorce, a heartfelt comment on someone’s social media post, something shared in a support group, a She’s Got a Story interview (subtle, huh?), or the dream long pressed into your heart.

What if today we purposed to stop believing the lie and choose to tell ourselves, “My story matters.”

Friend, your story matters. I can’t wait to hear it….